With days getting longer and a sense of new beginnings ahead, as we are approaching summer; an all around sense of HAPPINESS seems to linger in the air.
This inspired me to pick up the topic of HAPPINESS, as this is something that is to be expected to increase ( in this season and) through Life Coaching, and is generally understood as an indication of progress and things becoming good or being just right.
It certainly is noticeably when we are lacking happiness and our pursuit of an increase in time spend happy is an forever underlying motivation, consciously or not.
But all too often we are confusing two very different things:
PLEASURE AND HAPPINESS …
It is within human nature to seek pleasure but even more so to reach a more constant level of happiness. We all have a customary level of happiness we return to after a level of distress, sadness, depression, grief, exhilaration, excitement etc. and we certainly know pleasure when we experience it, a sensation we are all to keen to repeat.
Quite easily we are mistaken, to see a frenetic rush of pleasure as a final destination or goal, when simply a more constant state of contentment, happiness with an assured sense of self worth, is what we should or are pursuing in adult life.
The acknowledgment of moderation and common sense should over time, growing up, replace an urge for sensual fleeting moments of pleasure , that sometimes could lead to pain and destruction instead.
Happiness that is achieved through short bursts, of maybe physically experienced pleasure is unsustainable, whereby a true sense of happiness comes from – or relates more to the mind and heart.
It is through our state of mind that we can influence emotions, it is our attitude that determines behavior and our general outlook in any given situation.
In fact, whether we are feeling happy or unhappy at any given moment often has very little to do with our absolute conditions, but rather, it is a function of how we perceive our situation, how satisfied we are with what we have.
– Howard C. Cutler
It is possible to increase our sense of life satisfaction by changing our perspective, without having to change the materialistic circumstance, and thus be happier. By utilizing and focusing on existing favorable circumstances , such as health, family unit, achievements in life areas such as hobbies etc. can be contributing factors to a happier life.
This brings a situation of contentment and maybe even self worth ,whereas material possessions can mean not anything in moments of emotional distress, upset etc, whereby a positive outlook can make all the difference.
Momentary pleasures, can also mean nothing if the heart is seeking a path to find ultimate contentment and life satisfaction. To suppress such desires, passions, longing, as well as associated anger, frustration, dissatisfaction and envy, will lead to a unhappier situation, where quite often more destructive, materialistic short term pleasures are used to cover up for the true loss of happiness.
So it is worth asking what makes you happy and was is just a short term fix. It is more important to gain an understanding and determine what makes you happy, what we desire and seek, that isn’t a momentary, fleeting state of pleasure. To see what we are denying ourselves at the loss of a happier life?!
To see and appreciate what we have and what we are and can be, rather than what we deny ourselves and fear not to achieve.
What are you masking with your unfavorable behavior?
What contributing factors in your life can you change, to have a more positive attitude ?
What can you do today to make a difference tomorrow?